Drive-by quoting...

[caz963]

"Crackpots" was just on TV... (aka the episode that spawned a thousand(?) Josh-fangirls...)



TOBY
It's 'Throw Open Our Office Doors To People Who Want To Discuss Things That We Could Care Less About... Day'

MANDY
Well, that sounds goofy, doesn't it?





SAM
It's not so bad. You talk to them for a minute. You give them a souvenir pen with the Presidential seal on it.

MANDY
This isn't a waste of time?

MARGARET
Oh, it's definitely a waste of time, but it's one of Leo's pet office policies.

MANDY
Why?

LEO
[walks in] Good morning.

TOBY
[whispers to Mandy] Sadly you're about to find out.

LEO
Andrew Jackson, in the main foyer of his White House had a big block of cheese.

TOBY
Hmmm.

LEO
I am making a mental list of those who are snickering, and even as I speak I'm preparing appropriate retribution. The block of cheese was huge--over
two tons. And it was there for any and all who might be hungry.

TOBY
Leo, wouldn't this time be better spent plotting a war against a country that can't possibly defend itself against us? *snort!*

LEO
We can do that later, Toby. Right now I'm talking about President Andrew Jackson.

SAM
Actually, right now, you're talking about a big block of cheese.

LEO
And Sam goes on my list!

SAM
What about Toby?

LEO
I'm unpredictable. Jackson wanted the White House to belong to the people, so from time to time, he opened his doors to those who wished an audience.

MANDY
And then he locked the doors behind them and made them eat two tons of cheese. (Much as I disliked Mandy, that was a well-delivered line!)

LEO
It is in that spirit...

SAM
Hang on. Mandy doesn't go on the list?

LEO
Mandy's new.

SAM
So it's just me... on the list?


and

BARTLET
Is it time for my 10 o'clock scolding?
(love it!)

and then later, CJ, Pluie and the completely sense-of-humour-less people she's meeting with...

MAN 1
We think you'll admit it was a pretty impressive performance for Pluie especially when you consider the impediments of modern life she had to conquer:
highways, housing, forest denuded of trees.

WOMAN
Not to mention the US-Canadian border.

C.J.
Sure, 'cause no photo I.D.




WOMAN
I'm sorry?

C.J.
That was a joke.

MAN 1
Why does Pluie make the trek? Because wolves have to breed with many packs in order to keep from becoming extinct.

C.J.
Really?

MAN 1
If they breed among themselves, they'll eventually produce offspring that's genetically weaker, thus endangering their long-term survival.

C.J.
That helps explain Buckingham Palace.

(BWAHAHAHA!)

But it's not possible to mention this episode without:

JOSH
I serve at the pleasure of the President, and it's a great privilege that I will never forget. I can't keep this. I think it's a white flag of surrender. I want to be a comfort to my friends in tragedy. And I want to be able to celebrate with them in triumph. And for all the
times in between, I just want to be able to look them in the eye. Leo, it's not for me. I want to be with my friends, my family, and these women.



*sigh*. He really is very sweet sometimes...

and, you know... hot




If you thought I was gonna leave THAT shot out, then you don't know me very well!

Good times...

(thanks to West Wing Transcripts, _jems and Screenmusings

Comments

[caz963.livejournal.com]

That speech is the only bit that makes me squirm... but then that might be because I'm British and we tend to laugh at stuff like that! I don't know whether I'd have fallen in love with Josh in this ep either, because I was already there! Such a dedicated fangirl!